This blog post is one of the most gutwrenching and relatable things – IMHO, at least for me – I've read in the last half-decade. The “You'll be ok. We're here for you.” that soon changes to “You're not ok yet? Get over that, don't be a wuss. Bye!” is all too relatable for me.
Most of the people in my life just stopped reaching out, and I'm left to do it if I want to talk to them. And if they won't do it, I sure as hell won't because I have other stuff to worry about, like having the energy to cook. It may not even be a small task for you, but for someone with chronic pain, IT IS a big endeavour.
I have fibromyalgia, a hell that began almost four years ago. During the first two years, more or less, I read a lot of studies. Still, none got me genuinely excited. That is until a team in Sweden decided to see if the syndrome has an autoimmune origin. The first part of their investigation points to that, and there was subsequent Research from another team that also showed solid evidence of this hypothesis being correct. The second part of the Swede's is still pending.
As far as I know, that's it for Research. A team or even two might be doing work around fibromyalgia, but publishing it will probably take a while. Even after that, assuming the identification of the syndrome's origin and the development of an effective treatment, it will take even more time to adjust the current shitty therapies available that fail miserably at keeping the pain at bay or at least at non-hellish levels.
Every day, the hope of getting access to an effective treatment for fibromyalgia during my lifetime fades away, little by little.
I recently found out I have stage two high blood pressure, the level just below a hypertensive crisis. My blood pressure is between 160 and 165 (systolic) and 100 and 108 (diastolic).
I should've known. For a few months, I felt a few chest pains occasionally, but I attributed them to fibromyalgia and the stress it has brought into my life. I was wrong, so very wrong. If you feel your chest hurts, see a doctor ASAP. Don't be a dumbass like me.
My heart rate has been wacky, and one of the last medical exams I did picked up on that. No wonder: I'm always stressed because I have my life fsck'd up, I'm in pain 24/7, and I don't know if I'll ever be able to get it on track and stop feeling a ton of pain. To see if it's something potentially severe or nothing to worry about, I'm wearing a Holter monitor for the next 24 hours. This is the cyborg phase of my life.
I'm joking, but I'm a bit concerned. I hope this is a mild arrhythmia and nothing more, as my doctor suspects. I don't need any more health issues in my life.