That which preoccupies me nowadays
I'm still alive Despite my 2nd cancer's announcement 6 years ago.
It's brought me to my knees Despite being fit and healthy, Giving me cause to prepare for death.
I still want to love and live Until this body Ceases and returns to earth.
No more careless days No more living like I'm immortal How much is this my fault?
I could live on for decades yet Some days I'd rather be dead already, To save the wait
They shove tubes inside me To show me my bladder And make their own decisions
I'm not really getting used to it I've started to have enough And just take my chances
I cry for my daughter, not yet twenty I wanted to be old I can't be happy any more
Sweet Buddhism to the rescue Make my happiness wholly independent Show me the way out of this suffering
Show me what I must do and know To end the birth-death cycle And stop the world awhile